!!! Trapped In Life !!!
Monday, October 11, 2010
She is really special !!!!!!
You are my inspiration
having you in my life
revived my sleeping devotion
You are indeed a special someone
Loving you gives me hope
to free this misery that I coped
in those times I gave up
You came and I stood up
Never will I forget how you always cheer me up
every time I’m sad and
for that I’m glad
Whenever I’m lonely
You were there for me
keeping my heart alive
with your every smile
I dedicate this poem to you
to show how much you meant
to me I love you
"My special someone"
having you in my life
revived my sleeping devotion
You are indeed a special someone
Loving you gives me hope
to free this misery that I coped
in those times I gave up
You came and I stood up
Never will I forget how you always cheer me up
every time I’m sad and
for that I’m glad
Whenever I’m lonely
You were there for me
keeping my heart alive
with your every smile
I dedicate this poem to you
to show how much you meant
to me I love you
"My special someone"
A too small description of me being in love !!!!!
If I had a thousand pages,
I could never name them all,
The reasons that I love you,
For the list would be too tall.
I love you for the melody,
I hear within your voice.
The way your blue eyes hold me,
A captive, but by choice.
I love you for your gentle hands,
That melt away my pain.
I love you for your loving heart,
That made mine beat again.
I love you for your loving smile,
With which my old heart soars.
These are some of the reasons,
Every second beat is yours.
I could never name them all,
The reasons that I love you,
For the list would be too tall.
I love you for the melody,
I hear within your voice.
The way your blue eyes hold me,
A captive, but by choice.
I love you for your gentle hands,
That melt away my pain.
I love you for your loving heart,
That made mine beat again.
I love you for your loving smile,
With which my old heart soars.
These are some of the reasons,
Every second beat is yours.
Thursday, September 02, 2010
Did she knew a bit !!!!!!!!!
Did she know I thought about her when I woke up each morning, as I drifted to sleep each night, and most of the time in between; and that even when I was not consciously thinking about her, I continually sensed the presence of her love within me?
Did she know I used to sit and look at her as she slept, studying the tranquil beauty on her angel's face; and that I said little prayers over her asking that sweet serenity would always grace her countenance?
Did she know I admired the way she cared for her family, friends, and anyone in need, and accepted everyone without judgement or criticism; and that she was my role model for how to treat people?
Did she know she went to places in my heart and mind where no one had ever gone before; and that I exposed the totality of my self - - the good, the bad, and the ugly - - because I had such complete and utter trust in her love for me?
Did she know she was the best friend I ever had, and the bond between us had a depth and breadth that could not be severed by anything less than a mutual decision based on true love at it's most unselfish?
Did she know I loved her profoundly and unconditionally, not just for her loveliness, sexiness, or intelligence (all of which I adored), but more for the grace and goodness that defined her essence to me; and that I marveled at how animals, children, and adults (young and old) were drawn to her gentle warmth like flowers to the morning sun?
Did she know I thanked God daily for intersecting the winding roads of our lives so that my life might be forever changed by the touch of her spirit; and that I believed He sent her as an angel to love me, lift me, and lead me to a better place emotionally and spiritually?
And I wonder if she knows that I love her still, not less for the passing of yesterdays without her, but more for knowing what will be missing from all my tomorrows; and that it helps me, when I contemplate the harshness of life in this unyielding world, to remember that out there somewhere is a rare and precious soul - - and she loved me.
Did she know I used to sit and look at her as she slept, studying the tranquil beauty on her angel's face; and that I said little prayers over her asking that sweet serenity would always grace her countenance?
Did she know I admired the way she cared for her family, friends, and anyone in need, and accepted everyone without judgement or criticism; and that she was my role model for how to treat people?
Did she know she went to places in my heart and mind where no one had ever gone before; and that I exposed the totality of my self - - the good, the bad, and the ugly - - because I had such complete and utter trust in her love for me?
Did she know she was the best friend I ever had, and the bond between us had a depth and breadth that could not be severed by anything less than a mutual decision based on true love at it's most unselfish?
Did she know I loved her profoundly and unconditionally, not just for her loveliness, sexiness, or intelligence (all of which I adored), but more for the grace and goodness that defined her essence to me; and that I marveled at how animals, children, and adults (young and old) were drawn to her gentle warmth like flowers to the morning sun?
Did she know I thanked God daily for intersecting the winding roads of our lives so that my life might be forever changed by the touch of her spirit; and that I believed He sent her as an angel to love me, lift me, and lead me to a better place emotionally and spiritually?
And I wonder if she knows that I love her still, not less for the passing of yesterdays without her, but more for knowing what will be missing from all my tomorrows; and that it helps me, when I contemplate the harshness of life in this unyielding world, to remember that out there somewhere is a rare and precious soul - - and she loved me.
Saturday, September 06, 2008
~~... iN EssencE ...~~
Where does the smoke go which i flow?
Where does the rings go which i blow?
Wandering in the darkness...
Why doesn't it comes for one last show?
Where does the image go
Even before it gets painted?
Lost in the realm
Where do i land before getting fainted?
Where does the dusk go before it arrives?
Where does the sun go before it shines?
Where does my psyche go before i light ?
Where does my vision go before i sight?
Where does the love go
before it takes birth?
Where does the pain go
before we get hurt?
I say
The rings comes back to you
The smoke hits hard till YOUR last show
The image endures into the colors
Before it gets painted
You land somewhere inside yourself
Before YOU get fainted
The dusk hides behind in the SUN
waiting for its phase
Your psyche prevails inside you
Till you showcase
Your vision gets depleted till YOU realize
The love suffocates inside till your frozen
The pain awaits inside for love to awaken..!!
I repeat
Its all inside and just embarks when its right..!! :)
P.S. - Spare me I am horrible at poetry..:P
Where does the rings go which i blow?
Wandering in the darkness...
Why doesn't it comes for one last show?
Where does the image go
Even before it gets painted?
Lost in the realm
Where do i land before getting fainted?
Where does the dusk go before it arrives?
Where does the sun go before it shines?
Where does my psyche go before i light ?
Where does my vision go before i sight?
Where does the love go
before it takes birth?
Where does the pain go
before we get hurt?
I say
The rings comes back to you
The smoke hits hard till YOUR last show
The image endures into the colors
Before it gets painted
You land somewhere inside yourself
Before YOU get fainted
The dusk hides behind in the SUN
waiting for its phase
Your psyche prevails inside you
Till you showcase
Your vision gets depleted till YOU realize
The love suffocates inside till your frozen
The pain awaits inside for love to awaken..!!
I repeat
Its all inside and just embarks when its right..!! :)
P.S. - Spare me I am horrible at poetry..:P
Saturday, June 07, 2008
Heavenly Solitude !!!
Rains are rather strange as a season. Its as if it yanks the memories by their ear and pulls them out from the dusty crevices they had tucked themselves in,all along.There are so many of them triggering at me right now,that i fear if i try writing them all down,they would yield incoherence.Maybe i would post them when my expression doesn't fail me.
It was raining heavily last night and somehow i felt invited to dig into my past and hover around the memories i had, contemplating the unthinkable or may be reviving what was lost somewhere in the recent times. Such times are the best to enjoy the melancholy that surrounds you. The scenic beauty of my college premises enhances dramatically when it rains. Sitting on the sparkling grass, letting the water drops fall freely on yourself and diving into thoughts under the light of a halogen with darkness all around you gives u a relishing feeling of how beautiful can solitude be. Introspection made me enter into a different world....away from all the memorial dust that lay in my head.
Solitude can be therapeutic at times. After a long tiring day of tossed about in the hustle-bustle of life, spending a few minutes with ones own self seems like stealing some precious curio from a museum. There is something inexplicable about the feeling when one actually is alone without being lonely and is absolutely content at heart at that moment. With all the commitments and responsibilities weighing on one's shoulders from the onset of adulthood, for some even before that, it is essential and at times crucial for retaining sanity, not to mention clearing the mind. The mind, though not specified in the human body anatomically, is one's best friend and also one's worst enemy if put to wrong use. An idle mind is the devil's workshop , goes the famous saying. But is it really possible to make the mind absolutely idle, even when one is in a complete state of physical static? It is possible though difficult, say experts. Easier said than done, isn't it? No matter how many self-help books one reads or how many advices one seeks, in the end it is we alone who can change the course of our own life, for the better or otherwise. However wrong things seem tonight, they would seem a little less heavier tomorrow morning. Sleeping over troubles helps at times but that does not mean giving into sleep forever. Just like how sleep is needed to mend the day's wear and tear of the body, complete rest of the mind is vital to sort out the messes entangled within. Today was the perfect opportunity to weigh my senses and evaluate them. I am glad that i made the most of it.
Close your mind and look into your soul
For that is where dwells the real world
At times a hot furnace or as cool as ice
That is where lies life's precious pearl
When we come here nothing we bring
The same is taken back to that place
In this journey where joy and sorrow
Compete to occupy the greater space
Hang onto your soul to the best of respites
From nagging unruly crowds umpteen
Cleanse it, nourish it, let it be blessed
Lightening the very essence of being
Split or broken, never too late to mend
A true conscience always to the rescue
All that is needed is just a li'l bit of love
To put back together the pieces of you
So did you idleize your mind today?
It was raining heavily last night and somehow i felt invited to dig into my past and hover around the memories i had, contemplating the unthinkable or may be reviving what was lost somewhere in the recent times. Such times are the best to enjoy the melancholy that surrounds you. The scenic beauty of my college premises enhances dramatically when it rains. Sitting on the sparkling grass, letting the water drops fall freely on yourself and diving into thoughts under the light of a halogen with darkness all around you gives u a relishing feeling of how beautiful can solitude be. Introspection made me enter into a different world....away from all the memorial dust that lay in my head.
Solitude can be therapeutic at times. After a long tiring day of tossed about in the hustle-bustle of life, spending a few minutes with ones own self seems like stealing some precious curio from a museum. There is something inexplicable about the feeling when one actually is alone without being lonely and is absolutely content at heart at that moment. With all the commitments and responsibilities weighing on one's shoulders from the onset of adulthood, for some even before that, it is essential and at times crucial for retaining sanity, not to mention clearing the mind. The mind, though not specified in the human body anatomically, is one's best friend and also one's worst enemy if put to wrong use. An idle mind is the devil's workshop , goes the famous saying. But is it really possible to make the mind absolutely idle, even when one is in a complete state of physical static? It is possible though difficult, say experts. Easier said than done, isn't it? No matter how many self-help books one reads or how many advices one seeks, in the end it is we alone who can change the course of our own life, for the better or otherwise. However wrong things seem tonight, they would seem a little less heavier tomorrow morning. Sleeping over troubles helps at times but that does not mean giving into sleep forever. Just like how sleep is needed to mend the day's wear and tear of the body, complete rest of the mind is vital to sort out the messes entangled within. Today was the perfect opportunity to weigh my senses and evaluate them. I am glad that i made the most of it.
Close your mind and look into your soul
For that is where dwells the real world
At times a hot furnace or as cool as ice
That is where lies life's precious pearl
When we come here nothing we bring
The same is taken back to that place
In this journey where joy and sorrow
Compete to occupy the greater space
Hang onto your soul to the best of respites
From nagging unruly crowds umpteen
Cleanse it, nourish it, let it be blessed
Lightening the very essence of being
Split or broken, never too late to mend
A true conscience always to the rescue
All that is needed is just a li'l bit of love
To put back together the pieces of you
So did you idleize your mind today?
Thursday, May 15, 2008
The Art of Living >>> The Art of Letting Go
Why do we have to part while the love is still there? Why do we have to suffer? Why do we have to cry when somebody bids goodbye? Why do beginnings have an end? Why do we have to meet only to lose in the end?
There are questions left unanswered, words left unsaid, letters left unread, poems left undone, songs left unsung, love left unexpressed, promises left unfulfilled.
In a relationship, one of the hardest things to do is saying goodbye and letting go. It is as hard as breaking a crystal because you'll never know when you will be able to pick up the pieces again. More often than not, they who go, feel not the pain of parting: it is they who stay behind that suffer, because they are left with memories of a love that was meant to be, a love that was.
At the beginning and at the end of a relationship, we are embarrassed to find ourselves alone. Unfair as it may seem, but that's the way love goes. That's the drama, the bittersweet and the risk of falling in love. After all, nothing is constant but change. Everything will eventually come to its end without us knowing when, without us knowing how, without us even knowing why. And we must forget not because we have to but because we have to.
In letting go, sorrows come not as a single spy but in battalion. It seems that everywhere you go,
everything you do, every song you hear, every turn of your head, every move of your body, every beat of your heart, every blink of your eye and every breath you take always reminds you of him or her. It's like a stab of a knife, a torture in the night. Funny how the whole world becomes depopulated when only one person is missing. Just imagine there are billion people on earth and yet it seems you feel lonely and empty without the other.
I don't know if it's worth calling an art, but letting go entails special skills sparkled with a considerable
space and time. Time heals all wounds but it takes a little push on our part. Acceptance plays a part. Not all love stories end with "...and they live happily ever after."
Sometimes we have to part because of circumstances beyond our control. We have to suffer if it would mean happiness for others. We have to cry to temporarily let go of the pains. Every beginning has its end like every dawn has its dusk. It's something we can't control, something we had to live up.
It's over.But life has to go on. Goodbye doesn't always mean forever. There will always be a place and time where questions will be answered, words will be spoken, letters will be read, poems will be recited in the night, songs will be sung in harmony, love will be expressed in solitude and promises will be fulfilled. Somewhere, Somehow, Someday.
There are questions left unanswered, words left unsaid, letters left unread, poems left undone, songs left unsung, love left unexpressed, promises left unfulfilled.
In a relationship, one of the hardest things to do is saying goodbye and letting go. It is as hard as breaking a crystal because you'll never know when you will be able to pick up the pieces again. More often than not, they who go, feel not the pain of parting: it is they who stay behind that suffer, because they are left with memories of a love that was meant to be, a love that was.
At the beginning and at the end of a relationship, we are embarrassed to find ourselves alone. Unfair as it may seem, but that's the way love goes. That's the drama, the bittersweet and the risk of falling in love. After all, nothing is constant but change. Everything will eventually come to its end without us knowing when, without us knowing how, without us even knowing why. And we must forget not because we have to but because we have to.
In letting go, sorrows come not as a single spy but in battalion. It seems that everywhere you go,
everything you do, every song you hear, every turn of your head, every move of your body, every beat of your heart, every blink of your eye and every breath you take always reminds you of him or her. It's like a stab of a knife, a torture in the night. Funny how the whole world becomes depopulated when only one person is missing. Just imagine there are billion people on earth and yet it seems you feel lonely and empty without the other.
I don't know if it's worth calling an art, but letting go entails special skills sparkled with a considerable
space and time. Time heals all wounds but it takes a little push on our part. Acceptance plays a part. Not all love stories end with "...and they live happily ever after."
Sometimes we have to part because of circumstances beyond our control. We have to suffer if it would mean happiness for others. We have to cry to temporarily let go of the pains. Every beginning has its end like every dawn has its dusk. It's something we can't control, something we had to live up.
It's over.But life has to go on. Goodbye doesn't always mean forever. There will always be a place and time where questions will be answered, words will be spoken, letters will be read, poems will be recited in the night, songs will be sung in harmony, love will be expressed in solitude and promises will be fulfilled. Somewhere, Somehow, Someday.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
I Wish.....
Well on any other normal day i would have come up with a big list,but today i just have one wish.Yes only one.I wish mom was here with me right now. I stay in Nagpur and its been an year without her.Gosh i am dying to see her. Although i talk to her every 2-3 days ,its just not the same as having to see her smiling beside you.I probably have never been so vocal about my love to her,and i guess i will never be. Somehow its very difficult to say "i love you" to your parent...(or is it just me !?!) The words just don't come out. Anyway here it goes...Mom i love you,for every thing you are and for what i am today.You mean the world to me.Somehow i had taken you for granted and never really gave so much thought to your presence in my life. I know you probably will never read this,but it just gives me a lot of satisfaction to have said it out,to have written it down somewhere.Love you mom,and i miss you.
Contemplation
Life is a series of changes… Some fast and furious – felling all in a single sweep; and others that come along so slowly and gradually that you don’t even notice until you've adapted yourself to them. So when I got tagged by someone (a long time ago!) to come up with three things that I cannot live without, I had to really think about it.
I felt it was impossible to live without the first bicycle my parents gave me when I was in 2nd grade(a small plastic bicycle) until my mum decided it was too mouldy (I still say "Was not!") and sold it away. When I was fifteen and got hooked wid a girl , I thought it would be impossible for life to go on without her, and so I hoped for the best for the next five years until we broke off. …At 21 years old, more aware of myself than ever before as a man who has the power to essay any role I choose, I thought hard…
Here are the three things that I wouldn’t be able to live without…
Starts with Identity…
It’s in my body.
It’s in my soul.
It’s in my favourite colour.
It’s in my favourite animal.
It’s what I wear.
It’s what I paint.
It’s what I write.
It's the people who raised me.
It’s the kind of house I grew up in.
It’s in the education I’ve been given and the lessons I've learnt.
It’s in the fights I pick and the arguments I make.
It’s the opinions I cultivate and thoughts I speak out loud.
It’s in my truths and in my lies.
It’s my dreams and my nightmares.
It’s what I destroy.
It’s what I create.
It’s my evolution with every passing second.
Without my identity I would be nobody. It’s is what makes me who I am…
Followed by Belief…
That the spark inside of me cannot be measured in carats.
That no one can make me feel bad about myself unless I let them.
That knowledge eradicates the boundaries I build around myself.
That what goes around comes around.
That honesty is the only way to enlightenment.
That the gift of forgiveness - given or received - sets me free.
That I should think the best of people until proven otherwise.
That the sun shines behind all the clouds.
That my family will love me no matter what I do.
That I will deliver on all the promises that I make.
That I will never compromise on my ideals.
People will remember how well I rose after I fell… Belief is what gives me the strength to rise.
And Finally Happiness…
In the smell of a freshly baked chicken.
In learning how to ride a bicycle for the first time.
In climbing trees.
In chasing butterflies.
In dancing in the rain.
In getting into a snowfight.
In reading The FountainHead though I have memorized it
In singing at the top of my lungs in the shower even though I know I don’t have the voice.
When my favourite song comes on the radio.
When I finish wid ma last peg of Antiquity Blue on the rocks.
From being able to laugh at myself.
That comes from serving food at a table surrounded by my family.
Every time I hug my dad.
Every time I argue with my mom.
When I look at old pictures of my dear kiddo sister.
When I think of the girl of my dreams and how she has shaped me in reality.
That comes from feeling my girl's eyelashes fluttering against my cheek.
That comes from listening to HardRock whem I am high.
They say "Aim high. Shoot low." I try to be happy about the small things – and then the things just fall into place.
I felt it was impossible to live without the first bicycle my parents gave me when I was in 2nd grade(a small plastic bicycle) until my mum decided it was too mouldy (I still say "Was not!") and sold it away. When I was fifteen and got hooked wid a girl , I thought it would be impossible for life to go on without her, and so I hoped for the best for the next five years until we broke off. …At 21 years old, more aware of myself than ever before as a man who has the power to essay any role I choose, I thought hard…
Here are the three things that I wouldn’t be able to live without…
Starts with Identity…
It’s in my body.
It’s in my soul.
It’s in my favourite colour.
It’s in my favourite animal.
It’s what I wear.
It’s what I paint.
It’s what I write.
It's the people who raised me.
It’s the kind of house I grew up in.
It’s in the education I’ve been given and the lessons I've learnt.
It’s in the fights I pick and the arguments I make.
It’s the opinions I cultivate and thoughts I speak out loud.
It’s in my truths and in my lies.
It’s my dreams and my nightmares.
It’s what I destroy.
It’s what I create.
It’s my evolution with every passing second.
Without my identity I would be nobody. It’s is what makes me who I am…
Followed by Belief…
That the spark inside of me cannot be measured in carats.
That no one can make me feel bad about myself unless I let them.
That knowledge eradicates the boundaries I build around myself.
That what goes around comes around.
That honesty is the only way to enlightenment.
That the gift of forgiveness - given or received - sets me free.
That I should think the best of people until proven otherwise.
That the sun shines behind all the clouds.
That my family will love me no matter what I do.
That I will deliver on all the promises that I make.
That I will never compromise on my ideals.
People will remember how well I rose after I fell… Belief is what gives me the strength to rise.
And Finally Happiness…
In the smell of a freshly baked chicken.
In learning how to ride a bicycle for the first time.
In climbing trees.
In chasing butterflies.
In dancing in the rain.
In getting into a snowfight.
In reading The FountainHead though I have memorized it
In singing at the top of my lungs in the shower even though I know I don’t have the voice.
When my favourite song comes on the radio.
When I finish wid ma last peg of Antiquity Blue on the rocks.
From being able to laugh at myself.
That comes from serving food at a table surrounded by my family.
Every time I hug my dad.
Every time I argue with my mom.
When I look at old pictures of my dear kiddo sister.
When I think of the girl of my dreams and how she has shaped me in reality.
That comes from feeling my girl's eyelashes fluttering against my cheek.
That comes from listening to HardRock whem I am high.
They say "Aim high. Shoot low." I try to be happy about the small things – and then the things just fall into place.
Saturday, December 08, 2007
!!! Dazed and Confused !!!!
It so happens to me that I have an important assignment at hand that needs to be done urgently, or an exam scheduled the next day, but I end up in a bad mood which arises out of nothing..or may be out of a very very small problem which itself is oblivious of its existence..Whenever I am confronted with such a situation, the result is I end up doing nothing the whole day and so suffering negatively when the results are out.Why it happens so?Why are we carried away by such paltry things?The reason may be is that people like me lack determination.Or may be they are emotionally weak. I would never like to call myself any of these..But the reality is something or the other needs to be changed. I am always willing to change myself, but then also I lack the determination to do it effectively. Today I thought of starting my day with a good studying schedule.But somewhere in the corner of my mind had a feeling of selfevaluation..So althrough the time when i was trying to study,I had a feeling leaving it and doing the latter job, though i expected myself commiting to my studies.It isn't so that i ve not realized my duties as a student or i have misplaced priorities,But I get myself carried off very easily and reach a destination where every part of myself refuses to do anything..showing resistance to each n every thing... Hoping that soon i ll find effective means and measures to change myself and direct my efforts nicely..
